Something Excellent

Feengoid wrote: ↑Thu Aug 03, 2023 6:07 pm > John: Take out the trash.

You deposite the CAKE in the TRASH CAN. Your wallet feels lighter already!

That's a good thing.

Feengoid wrote: ↑Thu Aug 03, 2023 6:07 pm > John: Enter door.

You are now in THE GARAGE.

If you owned a car, this is where it would go. But you do not know how to drive.

Instead, you use the space to store items of SENTIMENTAL VALUE, and to keep your WEIRD SCIENCE GIZMOS under wraps. You do not want anyone to see them. What would the neighbors think?

Also, you come here to do laundry.

> John: Disarm crappy cruxite dowel fort.
> John: Examine banners.
> John: OK thats enough. Leave.

> John: Captchalogue bucket for later use.
> John: Fondly regard Tim Allen portrait.

(sick updates deac happy to see that this came back)

GargleGoyle wrote: ↑Fri Aug 04, 2023 3:27 am > John: Fondly regard Tim Allen portrait.

You regard it SO fondly. Tim Allen is another of the old world's greatest heroes, and one of its greatest fathers.

Now his visage haunts your garage, like some sort of GHOST DAD.

GargleGoyle wrote: ↑Fri Aug 04, 2023 3:27 am > John: Captchalogue bucket for later use.

Surely this bucket can be used to boost your PRANKSTER'S GAMBIT! If only there were someone around to prank.

Feengoid wrote: ↑Thu Aug 03, 2023 11:44 pm > John: Disarm crappy cruxite dowel fort.

Looks like somebody beat you to it. Maybe a gust of wind blew it over when you had the door open? You don't feel so confident in saying that, though, because you are in charge of that sort of thing.

Feengoid wrote: ↑Thu Aug 03, 2023 11:44 pm > John: Examine banners.

You recovered the golden banner from the RUINS OF PROSPIT. It was shredded to tatters by a MEDDLESOME ARCHAGENT some years ago.

==>


Above it is a poster for your old favorite movie. You've moved onto bigger and better films since you were thirteen, but it still holds a special place in your heart.

It's a little dirty

A LITTLE ROUGH AROUND THE EDGES

IT'S BEEN THROUGH A LOT

BUT IT HAS CHARACTER

JUST LIKE YOU

You could make a new one, but you won't. Not ever.

Feengoid wrote: ↑Thu Aug 03, 2023 11:44 pm > John: OK that's enough. Leave.

Sure, back into the hallway you go.

You say hello to Matt.

> John: Go back to the kitchen.
> John: Call Dave.

I can't believe John's subconscious self-hatred is controlling his wind powers and fucking with his fort. Who the hell is Matt?

> John: Proceed right and look for fort destroyer.

Radical Dude 42 wrote: ↑Sun Aug 06, 2023 7:37 am I can't believe John's subconscious self-hatred is controlling his wind powers and fucking with his fort. Who the hell is Matt?

mcconaughey!

John: Leer out the upper window at the neighbours.
John: Go out back and fill the bucket out with pool water.

> Update again out of guilt.

Meatman wrote: ↑Wed Aug 09, 2023 12:26 am John: Leer out the upper window at the neighbours.

Standing on your tippy-toes to reach the window, you scan the neighbors' yard for any sign of movement.

Hmmm... you guess nobody's home. And here you were, thinking your neighbors might've been behind whatever that was in the garage!

Radical Dude 42 wrote: ↑Sun Aug 06, 2023 7:37 am > John: Proceed right and look for fort destroyer.

Looks like you'll have to postpone your righteous quest to avenge your epic fort, someone is trying to reach you on the phone.

> John: Answer.

> John: Answer.
==>


> John: Follow tough yet fair advice.


You go to slice open the envelope and... damn! You left your razor in the garbage, stupid! Ew, how are you going to shave your face now, knowing where it's been?

You should probably retrieve your razor so that you can finally read this bad boy.

> Retrieve Razor from Edge
> Update Karkat's contact name in your mind to something inflammatory
> Retrieve Razor from Garbage