Everafter

[Deacon Blues]

Everafter



A young man stands in his bedroom. It just so happens that today, the 13th of Yohan, is this young man's birthday. Though it was eighteen years ago he was given life, it was only five years ago he was given a name!

What was this young man's name again?

> John Egbert: Examine Room.


That's right, your name is JOHN! As was previously mentioned it is your BIRTHDAY. You have a variety of INTERESTS. You have a passion for REALLY TERRIBLE MOVIES. You like to program computers but you are STILL NOT THAT GOOD AT IT. You have a fondness for CLOSE-UP MAGIC, and are an aspiring AMATEUR COMIC. You also like to chat with your FRIENDS sometimes.

What will you do?

[Deacon Blues]

deacon note: i finished making pretty much all the assets for this comic today, so i thought i'd go ahead and make the first update. i know how i want the first 30 or so pages to go, so i can make those updates pretty easily. as for after that, i'm not entirely sure, so i'll probably take a break from updating for a while until i can write a loose outline.

you might consider this a rough draft of the comic. because this is a private forum, and because i know you guys, i won't feel bad if i decide to change something later (or just scrap the thing and start over).

one last thing, i want this comic to be as easy for me to make as possible, so that means i'll probably be using my own commands sometimes. that doesn't mean i'm going to totally neglect reader participation, that's where the fun of these things comes from, but if there's a thing i want to happen or a direction i want the comic to go i won't hesitate to just shoehorn it in myself.

[averageJokester]

> John: Quickly retrieve arms from drawer.
> John: Examine Troll Will Smith poster.

[Meatman]

John: Pull rolled-up poster out from under bed.
John: Captchalogue dangerous nails.
John: Examine colour-coded letters.

[Deacon Blues]

> John: Quickly retrieve arms from drawer.

You rush to the nearest drawer to retrieve your ARMS, only to find it full of CLOTHES. You wonder where your arms could be.

> John: Examine Troll Will Smith poster.

Troll Will Smith was great in this movie. His fast-talking charms made him perfect for the role of professional matchmaker. Yes, he smoothly operated the machine of love with total ease, helping to fill the quadrant of many a lovesick Troll.

THE CURE FOR THE COMMON MAN. INDEED.

This is what you would say if you saw the movie, the poster was a GIFT FROM A FRIEND. He swears by it, though.

[Deacon Blues]

John: Examine color-coded letters.

You are not so anal-retentive as to color-code your things. These BIRTHDAY LETTERS were written by your FRIENDS in the colors of their choosings for your thirteenth birthday. Despite it being a few years now, you've kept the LETTERS as cherished keepsakes.

John: Pull rolled-up poster out from under bed.

You pull out the POSTER from under your bed and hastily CAPTCHALOGUE it in your WALLET. You know exactly what this means.

The POSTER is a gift from one of your aforementioned FRIENDS. You should probably get to hanging it up.

While you are at it, you also decide to captchalogue FOUR (4) NAILS onto the top card, pushing the POSTER down a card. This doesn't actually matter though because wallets are not beholden to the rules of DATA STRUCTURES, meaning you can fetch ARTIFACTS from them with ease.

[Feengoid]

> John: Examine CDs on CD RACK.
> John: Examine tentacled chest.
> John: Smash cakes with furious disgust.

[averageJokester]

> John: Check calendar.
> John: Examine ROCK poster.
> John: Find a hammer.

[Opal]

>John: Check computer.
>John: Look out the window.
>John: Play 52-pickup with strife deck.

[Deacon Blues]

> John: Examine CDs on CD RACK.

Many sleepless nights have been dedicated to this fine collection of titles.

[Deacon Blues]

> John: Smash cakes with furious disgust.

What cakes?

> John: Check calendar.

You've marked your birthday, the 13th of Yohan. Nobody has wished you a happy birthday yet. It's starting to become a sore subject with you.

Above the grid of dates there is a photo of legendary comedian JEFF FOXWORTHY. He is alright, you guess.

> John: Examine tentacled chest.

The MAJYYK CHEST is another GIFT FROM A FRIEND of yours. You pry open its lid and examine the interior.

Hey, there's stuff in here!

Among its contents lie ONE (1) FAKE ARM, ONE (1) MAGIC WAND, SEVERAL (~) BLOOD CAPSULES, SEVERAL (~) DICE, ONE (1) DECK OF CARDS, ONE (1) COPY OF TROPIC THUNDER ON BLU-RAY, and ONE (1) COPY OF THE FATHERLY GENT'S SHAVING ALMANAC.

Some of this stuff may be of use down the line. You decide just to take the FAKE ARM for now.

[Radical Dude 42]

> John: Comb through shaving almanac.
> John: Look at photograph on lid.
> John: Please do majyyk with magic wand now.

[Deacon Blues]

> John: Look at photograph on lid.

It is a photo of your FRIEND which was included with the chest as a FACETIOUS SENTIMENTAL GESTURE. At least that's what she told you, but you know your friends well enough to tell their facetious gestures from their genuine ones.

Another friend appears to have photobombed.

> John: Comb through shaving almanac.

Combing through a shaving almanac is as easy as shaving through a combing almanac, which is to say it is NOT VERY EASY AT ALL. You decide to stow the ALMANAC in your wallet for now and resolve to read it when you have the time to really dig into it.

>John: Play 52-pickup with strife deck.

What? You don't have time for that kind of chicanery! Besides, you don't want to make a mess of your...

Oh, shit. In a momentary lapse of concentration, you accidentally eject the contents of your STRIFE PORTFOLIO.

> John: Find a hammer.

You find many hammers.

You regroup the HAMMERKIND SPECIBUS to your strife portfolio, along with BUNNYKIND and UMBRELLAKIND.

Now that you're carrying around a surplus of hammers you should probably think of a way to use them all. Something exceptionally productive that won't waste your time.

[Deacon Blues]

phpbb has this weird habit of displaying whatever a linked image initially looked like-- that is, if i make a mistake with a panel i've already hosted to pipe and i go back and fix it, phpbb will still show off the original, busted version! what the heck. oh i also just noticed the custom icon in the upper left hand corner is gone. maybe i shouldn't have pointed that out. whatever.

[Feengoid]

> John: Check out hammer collection.
> John: Look out window.
> John: Combine poster and nails cards.

[Deacon Blues]

> John: Please do majyyk with magic wand now.

Were you even listening?? You just said you were going to be productive instead of... whatever you are being right now!

You have been having lots of stupid thoughts today. Stupid, stupid thoughts.

> John: Combine poster and nails cards.

You MERGE the cards containing the NAILS and the POSTER. They can now be used together.

But you already knew this, because when it comes to sylladex management, you are kind of a pro.

John: Use hammers with poster/nails on wall.




You use the HAMMER, NAILS, and POSTER on the blank space on the wall.

It's not exactly what you wanted, but it's still pretty cool. You resolve to ask your friend about this later.

> John: Look out window.

You see the view of your backyard from your window.

Standing in the grass is a pool. During the warmer months, pools like this one can't help but spring up in backyards worldwide. Yes, your pool is merely symptomatic of this MUCH LARGER ISSUE.

The view is ENTIRELY UNREMARKABLE. You like it anyways.

>John: Check computer.

As you roll up to your COMPUTER, you are alerted to a notice. Someone is messaging you.

You are greeted by a modest arrangement of DESKTOP APPLICATIONS and OTHER STUFF. They are suspended over a very handsome WALLPAPER that you made yourself, and that you are rather proud of.

Your PESTERCHUM application is flashing. Someone is trying to get in touch with you.

John: Open message.

► Show Spoiler

-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 16:13 --

TG: hey so have you gotten your hands on any birthday swag or what
EB: yeah, i got your poster. i am holding out on judging how awesome it is until i see the movie, though.
TG: hell yes i was hoping i could get you to watch something actually good for once
TG: goodfellas is a classic youll love it
EB: i don't know, it looks kind of heavy...
TG: its a step up from the latest mcconaughey chick flick
TG: idk how youre not tired of that smirking jackal yet
EB: my appreciation for him is entirely ironic and not based on his cool charisma or disarming smiles.
TG: oh my god i get it i used to be a major tool
TG: it was like a half decade ago when will i finally live this down
EB: never. anyways, have you heard from jade or rose today? i was hoping they would wish me a happy birthday but i haven't heard from either of them.
TG: thats pretty surprising considering they were both up my ass last night
TG: they just couldnt get enough of these sweet cheeks
TG: could hardly sleep with all these pesterchum dings emanating from the computer
EB: ew. i don't want to entertain that line of thought.
EB: if they do mention anything about my birthday, could you let me know?
TG: sure
TG: oh and one last thing
TG: happy birthday john
EB: thanks dave :B

[Deacon Blues]

now begins the great load time, where i actually figure out some broad plot points and also enjoy my winter break. so everafter is ON PAUSE for a while. i told you it would happen! i told you!!!

[averageJokester]

have a nice break deac!!
> John: Open programming projects folder.
> John: Examine mouse pad.

[Deacon Blues]

> John: Examine mouse pad.

Under your mouse rests the latest issue of PIPE ENJOYER MAGAZINE. You don't really care about pipes that much, but you were gifted a year's subscription one year ago by one of your friends.

You are still not one hundred percent certain if it's an ironic gift or not.

> John: Open programming projects folder.

You attempt to catch yourself up on your pathetic programming exploits, but are interrupted by a RING OF THE PHONE. You should probably go and get that.

[Radical Dude 42]

> John: Look for the one true ring of the phone.
> John: Locate phone.

[Deacon Blues]

> John: Look for the one true ring of the phone.

You step into the HALLWAY.

On the walls you've mounted portraits of the old world's GREATEST HEROES. Guests are quick to point out that having a row of D-list celebrities staring at them as they walk to the bathroom is more than a little unnerving, but you do your best not to listen.

The PHONE continues to ring in the KITCHEN.

[Deacon Blues]

> John: Go down hallway.




You enter the LIVING ROOM just in time to hear the phone stop ringing. You can, however, make out someone leaving a message on the machine.

For a moment, you can almost smell a rich, buttery aroma, wafting over from the kitchen. It must be your imagination.

[averageJokester]

> John: Don green jacket.
> John: Examine pipe.
> John: Check message.

[Feengoid]

>John: Examine fatherly portrait.
>John: Equip hats.
>John: Follow scent.

[Radical Dude 42]

> John: Okay stop. Why don't you have an easy hands-free communication device?